LIVE
FIVE DEGENS · ONE BAND · ZERO FINANCIAL PLAN

We lost it all.
Now we rock.

They bought the top. They sold the bottom. They got liquidated. So five bankrupt degens did the only logical thing left: they started a band.

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The five Crytles: Lenny Leverage, Hodl Harry, Maybe Mia, Degen Dave and Gas Fee Gary
NOW PLAYING · BAND RADIO
Ghost of Andromeda
Blue Deer Studio
BAND DELUSION INDEX
97/ 100 · EXTREME HOPIUM
BAND TREASURY
0.00 SOL
Last updated: right after the liquidation
TIMES BOUGHT THE TOP
Every. Single. Time.
THE STORY

Five empty wallets. One destroyed dream.

They came to crypto to become millionaires. They lost everything. With no money left to trade and nobody willing to take them seriously, they came up with one last desperate plan: become the biggest rock sensation on the internet.

They wanted matching suits. They couldn’t afford them. So each one showed up in whatever was left in his closet.

Then came Mia. She bet on everything: elections, rate cuts, tomorrow’s weather. The only bet she ever won? That this band would never make it. Now she’s trying very hard to lose it. She plays keys, sings better than the other four combined, and keeps the band from completely falling apart. Maybe.

They lost their portfolios. They lost their dignity. But they never lost their delusion.

THE BAND

Meet the lineup

Lenny Leverage
VOCALS$DOGGO
Lenny Leverage

Went 100x long on a dog coin at 5 a.m. Woke up liquidated. Still wears the coin around his neck.

Hodl Harry
BASSBTC
Hodl Harry

Preached HODL for four years. Sold the exact bottom. The headphones are still on; nothing is playing.

Degen Dave
FRONTMAN · GUITARSOL
Degen Dave

Believes the next coin is the one. Sees candlesticks even with his eyes closed.

Gas Fee Gary
DRUMSETH
Gas Fee Gary

Didn’t lose it trading. Lost it all to gas fees. The hat is the only thing he has left.

Maybe Mia
KEYS · VOCALSPREDICTIONS
Maybe Mia

Bets on everything, sure of everything, wrong about everything. Her one winning bet: that this band would never make it.

THE COLLECTION

Every degen gets a portrait

Five band members. Endless outfits, backgrounds and bad decisions. Minted on Solana.

EDITION
1/1
MARKET
Magic Eden
CHAIN
Solana
Lenny Leverage in front of a crashing chartBG: Chart Crash
Hodl Harry in a thrift-store tuxedo at a pawn shopBG: Pawn Shop
Degen Dave on a rainy neon streetBG: Neon Rain
Gas Fee Gary in a graffiti alleyBG: Graffiti Alley
ULTRA-RARE TRAIT

The Matching Suit

The one night they finally afforded matching suits. It never happened again.

Lenny Leverage in the matching teal suit Hodl Harry in the matching teal suit Degen Dave in the matching teal suit Gas Fee Gary in the matching teal suit Maybe Mia in the matching teal suit
THE MUSIC

Songs about losing money

Every crash gets a song. New tracks drop on the band’s YouTube channel. Holders hear them first.

Subscribe on YouTube
TRACK 01
Bought the Top

The band’s first single. A love song to perfect timing, in reverse.

COMING SOON
TRACK 02
Liquidation Blues

Lenny’s 5 a.m. wake-up call, set to a slow twelve-bar groove.

COMING SOON
TRACK 03
Gas Fee Lullaby

Gary sings his savings to sleep, one transaction at a time.

COMING SOON
TRACK 04
Diamond Hands, Empty Pockets

Harry’s anthem. Still holding. Nothing left to hold.

COMING SOON
TRACK 05
Maybe (63%)

Mia’s ballad about the odds of a comeback. Probably.

COMING SOON
THE TOKEN

$CRYTLES

The band’s official currency. Airdropped to holders after the mint, because the people who believed first deserve to lose money first. (Joke. Mostly.)

Ticker$CRYTLES
ChainSolana
Total supply[TBA]
Holder airdrop[TBA] %
ContractNot live yet
ROADMAP

The Comeback Tour

ACT IONGOING
Garage Rehearsals

Building the fanbase: memes, comics and portraits on X, Instagram and Discord.

ACT IILIVE
The First Gig

The collection is live on Magic Eden. New 1/1s get added along the way.

ACT IIISOON
The Album Drop

$CRYTLES airdrop to holders. Collect all five members for a bonus.

ACT IVLATER
World Tour

Legendary 1/1 band scenes, merch and holder meetups.

HOLDERS ONLY

Backstage

Connect a wallet holding a Crytle to get past the bouncer.

Sorry pal, band members and holders only.

Inside: new songs before YouTube, hi-res downloads, votes on the next track, and for full-band holders a yearly merch box with a tee, stickers and the album on cassette or CD.